Two coffees in Heaven

Socialism is Not the Answer

via e-mail

 

Having arrived at the Gates of Heaven, (on a one day pass)

Barack Obama meets a man with a beard.

‘Are you Mohammed?’ he asks.

‘No my son, I am St. Peter; Mohammed is higher up.’

Peter then points to a ladder that rises into the clouds.

Delighted that Mohammed should be higher than St. Peter,

Obama climbs the ladder in great strides,

climbs up through the clouds and comes into a room

where he meets another bearded man.

He asks again, ‘Are you Mohammed?’

‘Why no,’ he answers, ‘I am Moses;

Mohammed

is higher still.’

Exhausted, but with a heart full of joy

he climbs the ladder yet again.

He discovers a larger room where he meets an

angelic looking man with a beard.

Full of hope, he asks again,

‘Are you Mohammed?’

‘No,
I am Jesus, the Christ;

you will find Mohammed higher up.’

Mohammed higher than Jesus!

Man, oh man! Obama can hardly contain his

delight and climbs and climbs ever higher.

Once again, he reaches an even larger room

where he meets this truly magnificent looking man

with a silver white beard and once again repeats his question:

‘Are you Mohammed?’ he gasps as he is by now,

totally out of breath from all his climbing.

‘No, my son, I am Almighty God, the Alpha and the Omega,

but you look exhausted.

Would you like a cup of coffee?’

Obama says, ‘Yes please!’

As God looks behind him, he claps his hands

and yells out: “Yo, Mohammed, two coffees!”

 

Keep your trust in God;

your president is an idiot.

Awesome: Man Describes What 2017 Will Look Like When Obama Is No Longer President

Conservative Tribune

Are you longing for Friday, Jan. 20, 2017 — Inauguration Day?

Do you spend more time than you should thinking about what life will be like after President Barack Obama?

Me too. And we’re not alone.

Our friends at Young Conservatives shared this story about an old man in late January, 2017

At any rate, here’s what they said:

One sunny day in January, 2017, an old man approaches the White House from across Pennsylvania Avenue where he’d been sitting on a park bench. He speaks to the U.S. Marine standing guard and says, “I would like to go in and meet with President Obama.” The Marine looks at the man and says, “Sir, Mr. Obama is no longer president and no longer resides here.” The old man says, “Okay,” and walks away.

The following day the same man approaches the White House and says to the same Marine, “I would like to go in and meet with President Obama.” The Marine again tells the man, “Sir, as I said yesterday, Mr. Obama is no longer president and no longer resides here.” The man thanks him and again walks away.

On the third day, the same man approaches the White House and speaks to the very same U.S. Marine, saying, “I would like to go in and meet with President Obama.” The Marine, understandably agitated at this point, looks at the man and says, “Sir, this is the third day in a row you have been here asking to speak to Mr. Obama. I’ve told you already that Mr. Obama is no longer the president and no longer resides here. Don’t you understand?”

The old man looks at the Marine and says,“Oh, I understand. I just love hearing it.” The Marine snaps to attention, salutes, and says, “See you tomorrow, Sir!”

That makes me smile no matter how many times I read it.

If President Obama Sees This Picture It Could Lead To A Major War…

SHTFplan.com

There’s not much that can keep President Obama off the golf course. According to the Obama Golf Counter, the President has spent some 192 days on the golf course since he took office, fully 10% of his term thus far.

Democrats and Republicans alike have complained about the President’s handling of foreign policy, especially as it relates to the most recent upsurge of the Islamic State. Last week, after a video of reporter James Foley being executed was released, Obama left the golf course to give a brief speech about the incident. Almost immediately after he returned to the green.

So what kind of motivation does the President need to get engaged in this and other policy issues facing America?

The following cartoon, posted by Jim Quinn of The Burning Platform, could be motivation enough if ISIS rebels were to do it for real.

As Zero Hedge notes, THIS would be unthinkable…

beheading of golf club


A Post Turtle

A Post Turtle

via e-mail

While suturing a cut on the hand of a 75 year old rancher whose hand was caught in the squeeze gate while working cattle, the doctor struck up a conversation with the old man.
Eventually the topic got around to Obama and his role as our president.

The old rancher said, ‘Well, ya know, Obama is a ‘Post Turtle”.

Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him, what a ‘post turtle’ was.

The old rancher said, ‘When you’re driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that’s a ‘post turtle’.

The old rancher saw the puzzled look on the doctor’s face so he continued to explain. “You know he didn’t get up there by himself, he doesn’t belong up there, he doesn’t know what to do while he’s up there, he’s elevated beyond his ability to function, and you just wonder what kind of dumb ass put him up there to begin with.”

Best explanation I’ve heard yet of Obama.

The Arrogance of Authority

(Texas) – A DEA officer stopped at a ranch in Texas , and talked with an old rancher. He told the rancher, “I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs.”

The rancher said, “Okay , but don’t go in that field over there…..”, as he pointed out the location.

The DEA officer verbally exploded saying, “Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me !”

Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removed his badge and proudly displayed it to the rancher.

“See this badge?! This badge means I am allowed to go any damn where I want… no questions asked or answers given!! Have I made myself clear… do you understand ?!!”

The rancher nodded politely, apologized, and went about his chores.

A short time later, the old rancher heard loud screams, looked up, and saw the DEA officer running for his life, being chased by the rancher’s big Santa Gertrudis bull…

 

 

With every step the bull was gaining ground on the officer, and it seemed likely that he’d sure enough get gored before he reached safety. The officer was clearly terrified.

 

The rancher threw down his tools, ran to the fence and yelled at the top of his lungs…..

(I just love this part….)

“Your badge, show him your BADGE…….. ! !”

Source:

Just wanted to let you know……….

Socialism is not the Answer

Just wanted to let you know – today I received my Fiscal Cliff and Sequestration Survival Pack from the White House.

It contained a parachute, an ‘Obama Hope & Change’ bumper sticker, a ‘Bush’s Fault’ poster, a ‘Blame Boehner’ poster, a “Tax the Rich’ poster, an application for unemployment, an application for food stamps, a prayer rug, a letter of assignment of debt to my grandchildren and a machine to blow smoke up my ass.
All directions were in Spanish.
Keep an eye out. Yours should arrive soon