Florida men caught with stolen power pole strapped to SUV in wake of Hurricane Irma

Free Republic

JACKSONVILLE, Fla. – During a time where a large number of Florida residents are without power in the wake of Hurricane Irma, two Florida men were caught attempting to steal a $2,500 utility pole.

42-year-old Blake Lee Waller and 46-year-old Victor Walter Apeler were arrested on grand theft charges Wednesday after someone reported seeing them load the pole onto the top of their car, according to the Jacksonville sheriff’s office.

(Excerpt) Read more at usmedtimes.com

 

“Uhm, what pole, officer?”

Recovered images from Hillary emails prove it was only yoga

The People’s Cube
While the Federal Bureau of Investigations is still at a loss regarding the content of Hillary Clinton’s e-mail cache from her days as secretary of state, one thing they have determined beyond a shadow of a doubt is that the Democratic presidential frontrunner is a diligent distance-education yoga student.

Hillary_Yoga_Instructor.jpg
Emailing yoga routines are standard practice in distance education, said Mrs. Clinton’s online yoga instructor Maha Bharata through an interpreter. He claims that over the years he has sent her over two hundred thousand Hindu-language emails with pictures of yoga poses, which constitutes 90% of the data that had been wiped clean from Clinton’s personal server.

Dear Abby

via e-mail

Dear Abby, 

 My husband is a liar and a cheat. He has cheated on me from the beginning,
and, when I confront him, he denies everything. What’s worse,
everyone knows that he cheats on me. It is so humiliating.
Also, since he lost his job 14 years ago, he hasn’t even looked for a new one.
All he does all day is smoke cigars, cruise around and
shoot the bull with his buddies, while I have to work to pay the bills.
What should I do? 

 

Signed: Clueless  

 

  

 

 

Dear Clueless: 

 

Grow up and dump him. Good grief woman!  You don’t need him anymore!
You’re running for President of the United States. 

 

Act like one.

From the World of Sports

In a news conference, Deanna Favre announced she will be the starting Quarterback for the Green Bay Packers football team next season.

   Deanna asserts that she is qualified to be the starting QB because she had spent 16 years married to Brett while he played QB for the Packers – even though she has actually never played football at any level from grade school up, never ran the offense of any team, nor ever played the game.

   During this period of time, she became familiar with the definition of a corner blitz, the nickel package, man-to-man coverage, so she is now completely comfortable with all the other terminology involving the Packers offense. A survey of Packers fans shows 50% of those polled supported the move.

   Does this sound idiotic and unbelievable … or familiar to you?

   Hillary Clinton makes the same claims as to why she is qualified to be the President of the United States and 50% of Democrats polled agree.

   She has never run a city, county, or state during her “career” as being Bill Clinton’s wife. When told Hillary Clinton has experience because she has 8 years in the White House, my immediate thought was, “So does the pastry chef, and the person who picks up dog shit from the White House Lawn”

   When it comes to running the State Department, her biggest achievement was a US Ambassador and 3 other Americans killed, by pretending terrorism had been defeated…..Her words still echo…“what difference does it make”

   Comment:  At least Deanna Favre is pretty !

Two coffees in Heaven

Socialism is Not the Answer

via e-mail

 

Having arrived at the Gates of Heaven, (on a one day pass)

Barack Obama meets a man with a beard.

‘Are you Mohammed?’ he asks.

‘No my son, I am St. Peter; Mohammed is higher up.’

Peter then points to a ladder that rises into the clouds.

Delighted that Mohammed should be higher than St. Peter,

Obama climbs the ladder in great strides,

climbs up through the clouds and comes into a room

where he meets another bearded man.

He asks again, ‘Are you Mohammed?’

‘Why no,’ he answers, ‘I am Moses;

Mohammed

is higher still.’

Exhausted, but with a heart full of joy

he climbs the ladder yet again.

He discovers a larger room where he meets an

angelic looking man with a beard.

Full of hope, he asks again,

‘Are you Mohammed?’

‘No,
I am Jesus, the Christ;

you will find Mohammed higher up.’

Mohammed higher than Jesus!

Man, oh man! Obama can hardly contain his

delight and climbs and climbs ever higher.

Once again, he reaches an even larger room

where he meets this truly magnificent looking man

with a silver white beard and once again repeats his question:

‘Are you Mohammed?’ he gasps as he is by now,

totally out of breath from all his climbing.

‘No, my son, I am Almighty God, the Alpha and the Omega,

but you look exhausted.

Would you like a cup of coffee?’

Obama says, ‘Yes please!’

As God looks behind him, he claps his hands

and yells out: “Yo, Mohammed, two coffees!”

 

Keep your trust in God;

your president is an idiot.