America’s ‘Secret’ Airline Is Hiring Flight Attendants Willing to Fly to Area 51

Travel and Leisure

via Free Republic

Stacey Leasca

Have you ever wanted a job that combines your love of travel with your love of conspiracy theories and mysteries? Well, the United States government has just the position for you.

According to a new job posting on the website AECOM, the government is looking to hire a few new cabin crew members for flights operated by the U.S. Air Force that depart from McCarran International Airport in Las Vegas. These flights allegedly shuttle government and contract employees back and forth to Area 51.

For those who aren’t familiar — and don’t follow extraterrestrial rumors — Area 51, located deep in the Nevada desert, has long been considered one of the country’s most mysterious locations. According to conspiracy theories, this is where the government is attempting to reverse engineer alien spacecrafts and conducts all extraterrestrial experiments. Though, according to the CIA, the area is simply a testing ground for the Air Force. You can choose to believe whoever you’d like.

Upon boarding the label-less white and red Janet airlines airplane, crew members will be expected to perform all the regular duties of a steward including briefing passengers on aircraft emergency equipment and procedures, and ensuring passenger compliance with all safety regulations. The crew members will also be expected to create flight manifests as necessary and ensure security practices and procedures are followed. They must be willing to attend trainings and provide “leadership, direction, and assistance” during an emergency, including aircraft evacuation.

Moreover, the advertisement calls for someone who is “level-headed and clear thinking while handling unusual incidents and situations,” which they note as severe weather conditions, including turbulence, delays due to weather or mechanical issues, hijackings or bomb threats. Somehow, the unusual incident of running into an alien isn’t listed here.

To apply for the job one must be a high school graduate or equivalent, pass a company-operated jet aircraft Emergency Training and Initial Flight Attendant Training, and maintain currency as a flight attendant. Moreover, the person must be able to “effectively perform all assigned physical duties without difficulty and without assistance,” meaning they will be required to push and pull heavy-hinged aircraft doors, which weigh up to 80 lbs.

The new crew members will have to comply with the dress and uniform code (we’re hoping this means you have to wear a spacesuit), and possess “effective oral communication skills, including good public speaking abilities.”

Oh, and the crew member must “qualify for and maintain a top secret government security clearance and associated work location access,” so really they are taking this posting seriously.

While you’d be sworn to secrecy over the things you see and hear while performing your job duties, just imagine the stories you’d be able to relive over and over again in your mind. Or, maybe write in a novel to be found after your death. That way neither the aliens nor the government can come after you.