Breaking: TOTUS Kidnapped In Virginia, Obama Reportedly Inconsolable…

Weasel Zippers

Crime of the century.

ENRICO, VA (WWBT) — NBC12 has uncovered one of those stories that makes you think: “How in the world does that happen?!” A truck filled with President Obama’s podiums and audio equipment was stolen in Henrico just days before his visit to Chesterfield.

We confirmed an investigation with the U.S. Defense Department. There are still a lot of questions. The biggest one being did the thieves intentionally target the President’s truck or did they take advantage of a crime of opportunity and give a big “uh-oh” when they saw what was inside.

When you see President Obama speak, there is a pretty typical setup including the presidential seal on a podium, the see-thru Teleprompter and a portable sound system.

Thieves saw the truck carrying that equipment and couldn’t resist the target.

We’re told the truck was parked at the Virginia Center Commons Courtyard Marriott in advance on Wednesday’s presidential visit to Chesterfield.

Sources said inside that vehicle was about $200,000 worth of sound equipment, several podiums and presidential seals, behind which only the President himself can stand.

2 thoughts on “Breaking: TOTUS Kidnapped In Virginia, Obama Reportedly Inconsolable…

  1. MAYBE SOMEBODY WANTED TO SEE IF THE PUPPET HAD REAL STRINGS, OR IF HE WAS ACTUALLY CAPABLE OF PUTTING TOGETHER A SENTENCE OF SUBSTANCE WITHOUT ALL OF THE “UH’S” AND “UM’S”.

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